I had many issues with making conversations growing up, especially the moments that I couldn’t be myself, due to my Disability. For my essay, I will thoroughly explain the effects of my life from my disability, especially how my life through school was, and where it led me to. Meanwhile, I quoted from a Poet’s literature, to see how similar the connections are between my story with theirs.

For my essay, I decided to create connections from the poem, “3 Ways to Speak English,”created by the Poet, Jamila Lyiscott. The poem follows through with Jamila explaining her experience of what she was told the right way of talking to someone. Being that it depends on the person and the way she’s supposed to speak. With her poem, all circulating back to her rephrasing the word, “Articulate.” The definition of the word meaning, “(of a person or a person’s words) having or showing the ability to speak fluently and coherently” (Oxford Languages) or in short, “Able to express ideas clearly and effectively in speech or writing,” (Britannica) with this term connecting back through her poem of how she’s meant to talk towards others. The poem follows through with the many responses she creates but makes a different tone, or figuratively, a different person, to be viewed by others within different backgrounds. She could speak with her heritage accent with her family, especially her father, or must speak professionally to her professors. She’s having issues with this ordeal, but rebels against those who tell her wrong, because of them being hypocrites.

To start things off, I believe that it’s important to explain my disability, and how much I relate to this poem in the first place. I was born with the neurological/developmental disability of the Autism Spectrum. It affects the person’s way of learning in general and different social cues. For most, I was born in the Non-Verbal Spectrum, which prevented the pace of speaking to others about how I felt or what I wanted to say. For years I had this problem, I knew that I would need support on the way that I spoke, Stuttering, lisping, and overall understanding the materials, but I outgrew many of these moments, and I shouldn’t have to deal with the issues up to High School. A part of the poem that stuck out to me was, “Now you may think that it is ignorant to speak broken English…” Some may not see my perspective of this quote, but I believe she meant that there’s no true way of even speaking to anyone at all, as the passage of language has been changed so that there shouldn’t be a barrier towards your way of just speaking. As for me, the ignorance of others who wouldn’t take the time in the day to even try to understand me, are the true people in the wrong to say how or when I’m allowed to talk.

Moving forward, my communication was at its worst when I transferred to a public middle school. Between the lack of connections with anyone, to being bullied, my ability to speak my heart out was shut away. When listening to Jamila’s Poem, another quote struck me, when she noted, “So when my professor asks a question, and my answer is tainted with a connotation of urbanized suggestion. There’s no misdirected intention, pay attention, cause I’m ‘Articulate” You can see the struggle that Jamila is facing, that she isn’t talking in the tone, or this case the perspective of being respectable in another adult’s eyes. The factor of how she’s being told to speak in their way of being taught of having a proper conversation. This relates to my struggles as well. I struggled to even say what I could, but felt wrong, as I was the opposite of being articulated in this school. Because the process of my attempting to speak to others was never heard. It felt as if everything I would even try to say, I’m immediately in the wrong. Because I was born differently, should justify your wrongdoings to me?

“Yo! Why were these books never about my people?” was a good question in mind when thinking about the education system. Why do they believe in their perspectives towards not focusing on how cruel students treat one another? Why haven’t you noticed the injustice that a victim like me isn’t receiving any help or justice Have you realized how uneducated the other students are? Or your lack of care in the atmosphere, just as long that you get paid? Over boring lectures that require me to speak in a grade year who hate me for no apparent reason. These were the right, and reasonable questions in mind when having to endure this problematic situation.

There would be a moment in our lives that we would stand towards just, and have confidence in our self-worth, and self-worth would provide us with the strength to be on our own and work our way into and through society’s standards. We can see Jamila’s growth from this quote, “So I may not always come before you with excellency of speech. But do not judge me by my language and assume that I’m too ignorant to teach, cause I speak three tongues. One for each: Home, school, and friends. I’m a tri-lingual orator.” This speaks of her confidence in who she is, and the confidence in how she wants to speak, no matter the background and versatility. I would say that this moment would happen to me too. Realizing that I shouldn’t have to take in and endure the bad moments from those who wouldn’t care for me, that I’m stuck around for too long, opened my eyes and voice to say, “I don’t like that, that’s rude” helped my self-worth.
It pushed me to find myself when I started high school. That the people that I care for don’t matter to me, and that my voice is my own alone.

At the end of this essay, it creates a wrap-around with the goal and idea that Jamila made for her poem. The idea that everyone has their own voice, a background to their voice, and a mindset to create their voices. That nobody has any power or jurisdiction to make changes toward how that individual feels. Silence is never an option to be placed in. This poem became one of my reassurances that my path is my own, and I’m doing it on my own, my best, and the best for myself.